Time travel has always fascinated me. The idea of travelling back and forth through time witnessing historical events and seeing what the future holds is an amazing one. In fact, many many years go, I had started writing a story involving time travel. In my story, a fanatical evangelistic minister goes back in time to try to stop the assassination of Mormon founder Joseph Smith. The minister believes that if Smith hadn’t died the way he did, he wouldn’t have become a martyr and the Mormon faith would have died out. Sounds a bit rubbish, doesn’t it?
Since I started Peaceful Rampage, I have not held back on my bullying experiences and the effects it had on me. I still suffer from intrusive thoughts on account of it. Therefore, why not write a story combining bullying with time travel? The concept is quite simple, someone who was badly bullied as a child invents time travel when they become an adult. Using this new discovery, they go back in time to times when their bullying was its worst and get revenge on those bullies.
While there is scope for a good story, there are a few questions that would be needed to be addressed when I write it. First, now being an adult, would the former victim use physical violence on the bullies who would still be children? It could go even worse with the idea of using a gun or other weapon to meet out the revenge. It could turn the story rather horrific, especially with my overactive imagination. With an adult assaulting children, the police would be involved but could they ever catch the revenge seeker? I’m already thinking of a non-detectable device which would allow that person to escape. Already, the possibilities are numerous.
The biggest question is how the avenger always coming to the aid of a child being bullied effect the child in question. The kid wouldn’t know it was an adult version of him or herself. Would the child begin to think they were unassailable and begin bullying others? Again, there is lots to think about here.
If you are reading this, please let me know your thoughts. Is this a plausible story or is it further proof of my insanity? Note: it would be a few years before I begin working on it as I want to finish my sequel to “He Was Weird.”
First, let me wish everyone a very happy 2024! 2023 was an interesting year for me personally and all around the world. First, I achieved one of my dreams since I came to Europe over 37 years ago. I got to Paris to visit Jim Morrison’s grave. However, the Paris trip opened my eyes to other things and removed some stereotypes. French people are not snotty and rude but very friendly and when I attempted French, they were very happy to help out using English.
While I knew bullying is a worldwide problem, learning about how a young French boy took his own life due to bullying deeply saddened me. It proves that a global effort is needed to rid the world of the horrible scourge known as bullying. In a very recent post, I suggested that maybe Denmark’s way of addressing bullying might be a huge step in that direction.
One real sad statistic from the country of my birth, the USA, was that there were 650 mass shootings in the country. It is also becoming a huge problem in Mexico. There needs to be a serious talk about gun regulation in the United States. My suggestion is to raise the age of gun ownership to 21 but if you serve in the military, then it should be 18 because you will be properly trained on how to treat a firearm responsibly.
Back to a personal note, I have made great strides in writing the sequel to “He Was Weird.” I will continue to write my story as well as some other writing projects like my contributions to the “Tee-Bone Man and Superdekes” saga, spearheaded by my good friend Mike Ladano.
That sums up my goals for 2024. I would like to hopefully finish writing my book and hope that bullying and mass shootings lessen. Happy New Year!
A few days ago, I came upon this article about how Denmark has the lowest rates of bullying in Europe and possibly the Western World. I found it very interesting and am sharing it here.
Why does Denmark have one of Europe’s lowest rates of bullying?
Denmark, along with Sweden and Finland, has one of the lowest rates of bullying in Europe. We speak to teachers, pupils and parents to find out how this Scandinavian country is managing to stamp out harassment in schools.
The Sluseholmen Skole in Copenhagen is one of many Danish schools where children are taught from an early age how to avoid bullying, which causes less damage here than elsewhere in Europe.
Meditation and cuddles are part of the morning routine for primary school pupils at Sluseholmen Skole. For teacher Maja Hindsgaul, well-being is key to learning.
“I’m the one they can talk to if something is difficult. And I’m actually talking a lot about who I am and what I like, and that it’s ok if they like to hug. I like that too,” she told Euronews.
“Of course, they have to learn to read and write and stuff like that, but they can do that if they feel safe. It’s my mission to make them feel safe so that they can develop social skills at school.”
Learning how to live with each other is part of the teaching.
“We’re always trying to get the kids to work together in different types of groups, across genders and not always with their best friends,” said teacher Louise Ibsen. “They’re also practicing social skills for how to communicate, and also how to compromise on different ideas.”
These methods are just some examples of the programmes used in many Danish schools to prevent bullying, as early as kindergarden. And the children are very receptive.
“Everybody has full respect for each other,” said pupil Polly Schlüter Bingestam. “Friends help you if you are bullied because they stop the bullies and call a teacher.”
Fatemeh Shahmarvand is a parent and part of the school board. This enables parents to take part in decisions regarding school programmes, which plays a key role in preventing bullying, says Fatemeh.
“I think the most important thing is that if you see that your children are feeling bad, you take it seriously and try to find out what could be wrong, that we parents talk to our children and find how to make them a bit more robust so that they can learn how to cope with adversity,” she told Euronews.
‘It’s harder to be a teenager:’ The impact of the internet and Covid lockdowns
Denmark, along with Sweden and Finland, has one of the lowest rates of bullying in Europe. However, a call centre, managed by Danish children’s rights NGO Børns Vilkår, has seen the number of calls related to bullying increase, as well as suicidal thoughts, in particular among young teenagers.
“We have all age groups calling about bullying, but it seems to be a particular problem for, let’s say 10 to 15-year-olds,” says Børns Vilkår’s CEO, Rasmus Kjeldahl. “And that’s where it’s extremely important for a child to belong to a group. The act of bullying is expulsion from the group.”
“The digital dimension has made it worse because the bullying doesn’t stop when you leave the school,” he added.
Helle Hansen is an education and school bullying researcher. She’s one of the experts who designed anti-bullying programmes introduced in Denmark’s schools 15 years ago.
Such programmes have been successful, but must be reinvented she says, in the light of new realities.
“It’s harder to be a teenager. We had the lockdown. We had Covid. You’re more alone. In general, well-being is challenged. Young people, or kids who are involved in bullying, they need something. They need to understand the meaning of being here and being part of it.”
“If we don’t understand them, they are meeting meaninglessness. And meaninglessness is a part of why they start bullying each other.”
The importance of communication and student-led governance
Understanding teenagers is a matter of course, for the headteacher of the Greve Gymnasium high school near Copenhagen. Like in many Danish schools, an anti-bullying charter can be found on its website.
More than sanctions, what matters most are group dynamics and dialogue with students. They have their say in the anti-bullying strategy, as they do for all the rules governing school life.
“We try to get close to the students in many ways and to discuss the teaching, the pedagogical principles, what they do in the breaks, what they do in their spare time, and of course, how they interact on social media. We have lessons about that as well,” said Mette Trangbæk, the Headmaster of Greve Gymnasium school.
“It’s very important that we dare to go close to them and dare to facilitate their life, not only life in the classroom but also life in their spare time.We work on trust, because trust is a way to get closely related to them, but it’s also to act upon the problems.”
That was a trust we could bear witness to in one final-year maths class. A group of students chose to leave the room to talk to us about bullying, with their teacher’s blessing.
“I’m an authority in my field in math and history. But I’m not an authority on what you should do or think. That’s responsibility,” Maths and History teacher Sanne Yde Schmidt told her students.
“I think a lot of bullying comes from hierarchies that don’t work. And then people try to take power by bullying someone else. And if you don’t need to take power because you have the power of your own life from the beginning, then that’s another situation.” she told Valerie Gauriat.
“The students have a quite big voice in the decisions that the school makes”, points out Mathias Keimling, a student representative at the school board. “If we hear that any of our co-students, have problems, we can take it right to the board, where our opinions will definitely be heard.”
Co-student Lucija Mikic feels the odds of bullying are lower in Denmark than elsewhere in Europe, because young people “learn from a young age to treat others as we would like to be treated. That’s very much built into the way we’re taught,” she says. “And it’s something you think of before you say anything to someone else.”
For her class-mate Jonathan Emil Bloch Teute, the way children and teenagers relate to adults also plays a role: “teachers and parents are seen as confidants and guidance givers more than authorities you have to respect and answer to. If you do experience bullying in Denmark, I think everyone has someone older that they can reach out to and help fix this problem.”
At the end of our conversation, the students meet up cheerfully with their maths teacher again.
“They missed the math class, but they learned something else that’s also important. It’s part of being grown up, to decide what is important.”, smiles Sanne Yde Schmidt. “To be a person in your own right is part of feeling well about yourself, and that prevents bullying.”
One of her students, Xenia Marie Biehl Wilkens nods approvingly. “Denmark as a country is good at giving us this feeling that we are a person, we are an individual, and we are heard and seen.”
“And important!” adds Sanne. “You’re your own person, but as a part of a community. We’re separate but together.”
Maybe if they had the Denmark model in “He Was Weird,” then the bloody climax wouldn’t have happened. On another thought, while this article has opened up scope for much thought, I can’t help that some Americans and a few British will simply tell me to go live in Denmark.
Last weekend, Mrs. 80smetalman and I, along with our granddaughter, Freya, went to Edinburgh in Scotland where my wife’s daughter lives. On the Saturday, Loretta took us all around the city, running us ragged in the process. The highlights were the Portrait Museum and the Scottish Museum.
Here are some pictures of the Portrait Museum
We had a mellower day on the Sunday, we took a tram to the Edinburgh Docks
I also found a cool pub called The Black Bull which had some good beer and music.
If you want to read more about my heavy metal experiences while in Edinburgh, take a look at my 80smetalman’s Blog. I hope you enjoyed the photos.
I’ve just return from a three day client holiday as part of my job working with adults with Autism. For the purpose of this post and any future posts I write involving these two clients, I shall refer to them as Henry and Henrietta. Note: Henrietta is the only female service user with the company and while that has never been a problem with me, some of my female colleagues have born the brunt of her outbursts due to her Autistic needs. However, the idea for today’s post comes as a result of an observation on Henry.
One great thing about taking these two on holiday is that most activities usually work out for both of them. If any planned activity involves a fairly long ride in the car, Henry is happy and as for Henrietta, if the end of the journey results in a stop at a cafe so she can have a hot drink, then she is happy. This formula worked very well throughout the three days.
My observation came today as we were planning to make our return. While eating breakfast at a local supermarket restaurant, Henry, out of the blue, stated that he wanted to go to the local Marks and Spencer’s. I explained to him that as we were heading home and going there would mean backtracking on ourselves. I also told him that we could stop at a better Mark’s and Spencer on the way home. For all my reasoning, Henry kept repeating that he wanted to go to the local Marks and Spencer, it seemed as if his mind was stuck. In the end, after our breakfasts were finished, we all just got in the car and headed back. I expected some sort of kick off from Henry but he didn’t. We did stop and go to the bigger store and this made Henry content.
What Henry did is not out of the ordinary when it comes to people with Autism. When they get a certain idea in their minds, that mindset is stuck and there is nothing that is going to alter it. It is as if someone has hit the pause or repeat button inside their minds. I know this for a fact because there were times in my life where my mind got stuck. Unfortunately, people handled it the wrong way. Usually by belittling me or even threats of violence instead of, like in the case of Henry, and I’m not patting myself on the back here, patience and understanding.
Shameless link to “He Was Weird”: There were a couple of minor instances in the story where this has happened although I don’t know if I convey it well enough. My experiences with the teacher whom I based the Miss Erichetti character on was the worst in this realm and her way of dealing with it was to humiliate me in front of the class. Even more so than the character does to Mark in the story.
People with Autism who experience this aren’t being stupid or anything like it. It’s a tick which inside their mind which causes it to stick. When it happens, what is needed is patience and understanding.
Boy how times flies when you get older. I can’t believe that it has been three weeks since I went to Paris with my daughter and future daughter in law. In previous posts, you have seen all the touristy things I got up to, especially completing my life long dream of visiting Jim Morrison’s grave. With me being me, however, I brought back another souvenir from the trip, a realization so to speak. My trip was an eye opening experience in regards to stereotypes.
Jim’s grave, in case you didn’t see it first time around.
The first stereotype was blown out of the water only after a few hours of being in Paris. I studied French in high school but that was 44 years ago. I did get the opportunity to use it when I was in the service when the ship I was on made a port call at Toulon in 1982 but that was all. Therefore, I tried to brush up on my French but I was still very anxious about things like not remembering particular words in sentences and verb tenses. However, I was confident enough that when we got to the hotel, I was able to tell the manager of our reservation in French. While I was feeling a little proud of myself, the manager answered in good English, “Mr. LeFevre, I have your reservations here.”
This was typical throughout the entire weekend. Everyone from waiting staff to metro staff to shop assistants all spoke very good English. That includes the heavy metal bar we found. On the Saturday night, I couldn’t sleep so I went out for a late night walk and stopped in a bar that wasn’t overly crowded. When the bartender approached me, I ordered, “Un biere si vous plais.” Again, the response came in perfect English. That brings me to another point, while just about everyone who served me spoke English, I faced no ridicule over my clumsy attempts at French.
My experiences bring me around to the second wrong stereotype about the French. Maybe because I was a tourist in Paris, but no one I encountered was rude. In fact, most were very friendly. When we went for breakfast on the Saturday morning, the young woman who served us was very helpful in telling us places where I could by Mrs. 80smetalman souvenir bath bombs. When I went to the bar later that night, the bartender was very apologetic when she let me know that the bar was shutting in fifteen minutes but she still served me. I think she found it amusing when I told her that I hoped the drink would help me sleep. So, in conclusion, yes there may be some rude people in France but from my experience, most of them aren’t.
If any stereotype annoys the French, it’s the belief by Americans that the French hate them all. I knew this wasn’t the case long before I went to France. Quite a few years ago, while on a substitute teaching assignment, I met a lady who was a French teacher in both senses of the word. Thinking I was being funny, I stated that because she was French and I was American, she was supposed to hate me without further argument. She wasn’t amused by my attempt at humour and she asked why do Americans think the French hate them so much. I told her it was more down to the American media. I did return to that school a few times after although not since Covid, and we got on great and she is a very lovely person.
As always, I try to link things to my book, “He Was Weird.” The only mention France gets occurs after Mark shoots up the school where I say that French news covers the event. But in reality, like much of the world’s media, mass shootings in America are always big news, so that was no surprise. Moral: I have always stated that stereotypes do no good. It keeps people from knowing the true worth of another human being and has no place in today’s world.
Another point: My experiences also provided a strong argument why foreign languages should be taught in school from an earlier age.
After visiting Jim Morrison’s grave when I was in Paris, the next day, my daughter Rowena, her fiance Eline and I did some touristy things the next day. We went to The Louvre and saw the Eiffel Tower. We didn’t go up as it was too expensive. Here are some pictures for everyone to enjoy.
The glass pyramid outside The Louvre
Me by the Pyramid
Love this Greek sculpture
Venus and Cupid
Egyptian sculpture
Zeus (Jupiter) with a lightning bolt
This was a seat for some Egyptian high priest
This painting was on the ceiling
This painting reminded me of a video from a Dio song
It was mandatory that I saw the famous ‘Mona Lisa’ painting
Painting of Michael the Archangel vanquishing Satan
David and Goliath
And of course, I had to see the famous ‘Venus De Milo’ sculpture as well
Eline by the Eiffel Tower
We ended the evening with a trip to a cool heavy metal bar.
Well, I finally did it! After mentioning it several times over the near ten year life of Peaceful Rampage, I can now happily say that I have been to Paris and visited Jim Morrison’s grave. This was something that I have always wanted to do over the past thirty-six years I have been living in Europe. However, due to that thing called life, I hadn’t been able to do so, although I did plan to go for my 60th birthday but Covid had other ideas. Here’s some more pictures.
Me in front of Jim’s grave
My daughter took several photos
My daughter Rowena and my future daughter in law Eline
With my objective completed, I left the rest of the weekend up to my daughter and her partner. After visiting Jim’s grave, we visited the grave of Oscar Wilde, who is buried at another part of the cemetery. In fact, the weekend has given me ideas for posts over the next few weeks. I had a great weekend, spending it with Rowena and Eline.
First, I hope everyone had a happy new year. Now that’s over, it’s time to be getting on with the 364 days we have left in 2023. Like with every year and like everyone, I enter the new year with a surge of optimism. Right now, I have several events coming up in the year which make me feel that way. Number one you can guess from the photo above. After being in Europe for over 36 years, I am finally going to go to Paris and visit Jim Morrison’s grave. Yes, I’m a sad aging American hippy but who cares? I’ve booked the flight, the hotel and my daughter and her fiancee are coming with me. So yes, I am psyched about going at the end of the month and I promise to post a full report here and yes, I will do other Paris type things as well.
Number two came as a pleasant surprise the other night while at work. I received a text from my eldest son, Jake, who informed me that I am going to be a grandfather again! He sent me photos of the scan as well, so I’m guessing the baby will come around late May or June. It will be my son and daughter in law, Grace’s, second child and my fourth grandchild. You can certainly believe that I’m super psyched about that.
The third one is less guaranteed and stirs some anxiety within. A few years ago, the local primary school around the corner from me closed down. After some speculation, it is going to be turned into a special needs school for children with mild and moderate learning difficulties. I’m going to apply for a teaching post at the school. Owing to the fact that I’m over 60 and have only been working as a supply (substitute) teacher for the past 15 years, I know the odds aren’t in my favour. What I can offer is the same amount of years of special needs experience through working with adults with Asperger’s Syndrome. How much that will help me remains to be seen. All I can do is try.
On the flip side, my wife, Tina, while happy about becoming a grandmother for the 15th time, me a step-grandfather, she is also going to be a great grandmother, which she is not so keen about. Her middle son’s partner will bear the grandchild but it is his 16 year old daughter who is going to bear the great grandchild. Neither Tina, nor her son, are happy about it. After all, most people I know think 35 is too young to be a grandparent and Tina is not looking forward to being a great gran at only 62. Of course, I will do my best to be there for her.
So, I have a lot to look forward to in 2023 and I hope the optimism holds, although my Asperger’s part of me is waiting for some big catastrophe to happen. Let’s hope it doesn’t. As I wish everyone a happy and prosperous 2023, I will end on the biggest compliment I received in 2022. When working at an Early Years Unit after my birthday in June, I was asked my age by a woman who looked in her mid to late 30s. I revealed my age to which she responded, “You look very fit for 61.” I hope I continue to look as fit when I turn 62 this year.