This has been the million dollar question I’ve been asking myself ever since I first put pen to paper over five years ago when I began to write “He Was Weird.” I’ve had people from both camps put in their two cents worth as well. When I posted the forward to the book, stating how being bullied so badly inspired me to write the story, there were many words of encouragement given by a good number of people on how brave I was. That it was good that I was standing up and talking about the hell I went through all those years ago. To those people, I said a hearty “thank you for your support.”
Obviously, I have responses from people who weren’t so supportive. I remember on one comment web site some woman stated, “Poor victim.” I could feel the sarcastic tone in her writing, especially as she went onto say that maybe I could get some government grant or sponsored support on account of it. Then there were the more obvious ones like I’m an adult now so I should just get over it and the one saying I should have just gone and punched all the bullies in the mouth. Yeah, right. To these people, I say you are no help, keep your opinions to yourself as you don’t know what I experienced.
With all my Aspergers induced anxieties, many of which were brought on by the experiences I write about, I find myself asking that question still. With last week’s post, “Billy No Mates,” I have had a lot of feedback, all positive, but I still can’t help feeling that I must have sounded rather pathetic when I wrote it. On the other hand, I get a good feeling when I have written about an issue and gotten it off my chest. Furthermore, I feel quite bold to have written it. This constant battle between the feelings of pathetic and brave continues in my brain. So, I have come to the conclusion that the best way to deal with is to feed the dog representing the brave camp. Much of what I post about have been feelings that have been antagonising me for several decades and therefore, I need to be brave and silence them. Writing about it does the trick. Yes, the pathetic dog will bark at times but if I am comfortable with the fact that while everyone is entitled to their opinion, I know that what I am doing is the right thing for me.
To buy He Was Weird, go to: https://www.amazon.co.uk/He-Was-Weird-Michael-Lefevre/dp/1909740942/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1465938557&sr=1-1&keywords=he+was+weird